Has Food Been a Substitute for Love?
It’s no secret that food is often associated with nurturance and comfort. From day one, we received love by being held and given milk to drink. There is a very powerful connection that being fed means being loved. And in moments when love appears to be scarce, food is always there.
Whether it is currently viewed as a friend or as an enemy may be up for debate, but the premise underscoring the food relationship is a need to be cared for and sustained. On a physical level, there is definite truth to this. Most people engage in some sort of eating behavior every day, and food is necessary to keep the body alive. But what happens when you no longer can tell the difference if you are hungry, or–angry, bored, scared, sad, etc.? The result is losing touch with your own internal communication gage of your truest, deepest needs.
What’s missing from this relationship that may develop with food is the genuine, supportive presence of yourself and/or another person. It may have began very early on. The caring, supportive presence of a parent or guardian may have been absent, invasive, or destructive. There may have been little choices to find honesty, acceptance, care, and understanding. You may not have known how else to soothe in lonely or painful moments. You may not have had anyone you could trust.
If this is true, take a deep breath. Your need for nurturance is very real. It’s a primary need that helps build the very foundation of our lives. A safe place to go for guidance, protection, and understanding is a natural part of human development. Sometimes awareness and validation of this need can evoke feelings of grief, however being aware of what’s happening is much better than being in the dark. A diet of compassion and self-love is what is indicated here, as well as beginning to connect with others for support. This may look like:
- Going for a walk when you instinctively reach for a bar of chocolate or sugary snack
- Consciously sitting down to do 5 minutes of a breathing exercise when anxiety begins to amp up
- Calling a friend when you begin to feel “the blues” coming on
- Joining an activity group or cause
- Begin to listen to body signals like feelings of heaviness, tension, fluttery stomach, quick changes of temperature as signs of distress and a need to ground/relax or get support.
GET SOME SUPPORT RIGHT AWAY! …REQUEST MY FREE PHONE CONSULTATION
